Tuesday, April 12, 2016

I'M SORRY.....

I really am.

I've struggled ( and very literally it's been a huge one ) with how to write up this post.
Every night I walk into the office and sit at the computer but the words don't come.
I end up sitting and staring out the window for far too long before giving up and leaving the room.

I published a post on March 18......a post I had already written up and so I simply had to hit publish or there wouldn't have been one on that day either because of something that happened on March 11.

"A South Shore family is in mourning, trying desperately to understand how their daughter ended up driving the wrong way on Highway 30 East, near St. Constant last Friday morning, slamming head on into a pick up truck.
Angie Adelin was just 36 years old, a few weeks shy of her 37th birthday. She was on her way home to Chateauguay after working 18 hours straight.
Her mom, Joanne Breen, stresses her daughter didn't often work a triple shift and didn't need to, but was hoping to earn a few extra dollars for a family vacation and for her two young daughters, aged 9 and 13.
She says police are investigating all avenues.
"Maybe she was just tired, it was very dark, it's very, very dark on the 30 where she came from working." says Breen.
Breen says on top of the poor visibility, there is a lack of road signs in the area and hopes Transport Quebec will look into that. 
"It's a very bad turn, I almost did it myself one time, and there's no signs not to go in or out." she says.
The SQ says there were no skid marks or any sign of brake activity at the crash scene. Officers spent the last few days trying to reconstruct what happened. "

This accident made headlines.  It was heartbreaking to hear about - a young woman in the prime of her life gone in such a senseless accident. It was all people spoke about for days and it's all I've been thinking about for the past month.
JoAnnie Breen...........a dear friend was the mother the article mentions.  And Angie was her life.
The older you get the more funerals you attend.  I have a funeral face by now.  I can offer comfort without falling apart ( took many many years to be able to do that ) I can say words that comfort more often then not and I've learned to be strong even if that means falling apart in the car when I leave. But this one? 
It threw every single one of us into an unrecognizable state.  I've been crying for a month most days. It's left me feeling vulnerable and frightened and more angry than I should be.
And most of all it's left me without the power to write.
For now.
I know it'll come back..............be patient with me?
I miss you all - I just have to sort out the jumbled rambling mess that's in my brain.
MARCH 16 - 1979
MARCH 11 - 2016


Much love
and again my apologies if I caused any of you concern
Really really tight ones.

Friday, March 18, 2016

A FRIDAY CHAT ( about this & that )

Good morning everyone !

C'mon in !
The keurig's been moved to another spot in the kitchen - John doesn't like it - he hates change but....

Everything changes.

When my kids were small I was told to let them cry - now I'm told it's not good to let babies cry.
I bundled them up to take them out - overly so just in case - now I'm told it isn't good for babies to be too hot in a car.
I started feeding my kids pablum quite young - now I'm told it's not necessary.

But then again I'm from an era where I learned to read from books that said:


which meant something entirely different back in the day.

And speaking of SEE DICK JUMP UP AND DOWN...............(pun intended for obvious reasons) why is it that I can't seem to get mad at Don Draper on Mad Men ?  I've had turns getting mad at practically everyone else on that show at some point or another.
My daughters think he's disgusting ( he is I suppose but I can barely even acknowledge it )
Am I that superficial?
Is it because he's the most beautiful specimen of a man?
I always feel sorry for him.............he's in bed with half of Manhattan and I feel sorry for him.
One day I'm going to visit an analyst - which in turn will send the analyst to an analyst who will kindly explain that there's just no helping some patients.

I've come to the conclusion that retardation doesn't have to mean that a person is totally retarded.
I know, I know, it's NOT politically correct to use the term - but I'm allowed to use it because I AM somewhat retarded.
Technically Retarded.
Truly I am.
There's a mental block that I can't jump past.
I'm still in utter shock that planes can stay up in the air - I act like I was born in the 1800's for crying out loud.
AND I HAVE to imagine a plane just flies UP THERE IN THE SKY -
when you show me pics of what it's actually doing my brain starts sizzling ( which is of course just flying up there in the sky )

But there's no safety net............not from crashing to the ground - but from being flung out into the universe.
I can't grasp that it's out there in the atmosphere and that the only thing holding it back from floating for eternity is a little gravity - my brain shuts down completely at the thought.

I mean you're talking to someone who has a hard time with Facebook.
I'm on instagram and I can't even use my phone to it's full capacity.
I've been thinking of just signing all my posts HASHTAG IDIOT ( of which it took me forever to even understand what hashtag actually means ) 

Here's the thing about me:

I wasn't born with one of these in my mouth


Nor was I born with one of these up my ass derriere ( well actually I wasn't born with much of a derriere period )


And I most certainly wasn't born with a technical gene - but that can be forgiven - God had no idea about social media when I entered the world hashtag whatthehellissocialmedia

But I WAS born with a wicked imagination - which kind of makes up for the lack of the other 3.
Well maybe not completely but you gotta take what you're born with.
A wicked imagination makes you a dreamer.
And that's a good thing.

Take it away Mr. Williams

See you later -  my huckleberry friends
Love you to bits even though we've never met
Hope you all have a wonderful weekend