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Friday, June 26, 2015

A Friday Chat ( about this and that )

Last week while we were at the nursery picking up plants and flowers - John stopped all of a sudden and started pinching at my neck ( just under my chin )
I swatted him off

Suzan says - Do you mind?
John says - There's a long one growing there !
Suzan says - PLEASE !  Not in public
John says - Here - I'll get it - stand still
John says - It won't come out - and now it's curling like a pig's tail
Suzan says - Thank you - thank you very much
John says - Let me try again
Suzan says - LEAVE ME ALONE - THERE'S PEOPLE ALL OVER THE PLACE
John says - Fine - you want to just leave it there blowing around - fine
Suzan says - Blowing around ?  How long is it?  Oh My God - I can't take it any more !  Can it actually blow around?
John roars..........

We got to the cash to pay - and his hand flew out of nowhere...........

John says - Ta Dah !  Got it !
Suzan yells - Ow !  Are you nuts????

The cashier looks at us and smiles.

John says - Hold on - there's another one
Suzan says - between clenched teeth - If you come anywhere near me with your fingers again today I'm going to knock you out with the rose bush..................
John says - It looks like you have a rose bush growing under your chin.

I'm going to speak to a lawyer next week - he's crossing a line now - really.

Did he really get that hair?
The answer my friend is blowing in the wind..........
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We ordered in Chinese last week.
Is that politically ok to say?
Or should I call it Eastern Cousine?

Suzan says - did you eat this as a kid sometimes?
John says - Never - it wasn't big in Yorkshire
John says - But when I turned 16 we started going to an amazing Chinese restaurant
Suzan says - What was your favorite ?
John says - Well I didn't eat the food
Suzan says - You went to a Chinese restaurant and didn't order the food????
John says - No - but their soups were out of this world.

CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?

Suzan says - Well when I was a kid - on the fifth time you ordered you got a small but fancy
John says - If I hear the story about the red lanterns again.

But it's true !!!
He loved the soups?
I loved the little battery operated red lanterns - does anyone else remember them?  They were red silk with gold tassels and I think they hung on a little stand.
My bedroom looked like a 6 year old brothel.

Later when we cracked open our fortune cookies...............

Suzan says - Mine says I should buy whatever I want - life is short - as I quickly crumpled it up
John says - Mine says I should golf twice a week - every week - life is short - as he quickly crumpled his up.

Neither of us verified what the other's said
But I think John made his up
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We' got trouble
Trouble with a capitol T
And that rhymes with P
And that stands for Pool...................

I wanted to have it opened professionally this year.
John wanted to save the money ( 250.00 or so )

And so we bought the chemicals
And we bought more chemicals
And then we bought even more chemicals - and couldn't get it cleaned.
We bring samples of the water to the Pool Store and they put it in a computer and tell us
" you need to buy this - that - and half the store "
We buy this - that - and half the store
Still not sparkling clean
We go back -
Well you probably have to have your sand changed.- the expert tells us.

I wanted to have it changed professionally
John wanted to save the money.

We changed the sand - for polished glass ( because we're very posh like that )
WHAT A NIGHTMARE OF A JOB !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
( and I don't think it had to be done at all - the sand did not look dirty )

The pool is still not sparkly clean.

John's off with another sample this morning........................
We're now over the 250.00 it would have cost to clean it professionally.

Oh we got trouble.
Trouble with a capitol T
And that rhymes with P
And that stands for Pool..........................
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WIKIPEDIA
Pressure cooking is the process of cooking food, using water or other cooking liquid, in a sealed vessel, known as a pressure cooker. Pressure cookers are used for cooking food faster than conventional cooking methods, which also saves energy.
Pressure is created initially by boiling a liquid such as water or broth inside the closed pressure cooker. The trapped steam increases the internal pressure and temperature. After use, the pressure is slowly released so that the vessel can be safely opened.
Pressure cooking can be used for quick simulation of the effects of long braising or simmering.
Almost any food which can be cooked in steam or water-based liquids can be cooked in a pressure cooker.
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The above is meant for food - not a life style - just saying.
Even if life sometimes feels similar -

I beg your pardon.................he never promised me a rose garden 

Yesterday the both of us felt like we were in a pressure cooker - and POP - the steam was too much and we exploded.
All over each other.
In the garden.
Over planting a rose bush.
One minute we were smiling at each other and discussing where the rose bushes should go and how beautiful they'd look next summer when they'd spread a little - me with a little dance because I was so excited - John leaning on the hoe - chuckling at my tap dance  -  and the next moment rose petals were flying all over the place and we were angrily pointing fingers and raising voices.

along with the sunshine - there's gotta be a little rain sometimes

It was NOT a Bon Jovi moment -
Lets just say he didn't want to lay me down on a bed of them.
He wanted to bury me with the rose bush ( he made the hole big enough anyway )
Only one got planted - the other one came precariously close to being tossed over the fence into the neighbor's yard.
A gift so to speak - to go with the free I LOVE LUCY episode they got to hear.

And for some reason today - I don't love rose bushes quite as much as I did yesterday.
_________________________________________________________________________________

I was so upset that I decided I was never going to cook him another meal.
Done.
Over with.
Finito
But I've had time to cool down and now I'm thinking I'm going to make him his favorite supper tonight.
Just because at the end of the day

You've got to give a little - take a little
And let your poor heart break a little
That's the story of
That's the glory of 
Love

You've got to laugh a little, cry a little
Until the clouds roll by a little
That's the story of 
That's the glory of 
Love

As long as there's the two of us
We've got the world and all it's charms
And when the world is through with us
We've got each other's arms 

( the better to strangle you with my dear )
_________________________________________________________________________________

You got 4 songs today so YOU get to choose which one sticks in your brain

Okay - gotta run - there's another &$^#*@&^$)  rose bush to plant :)

Suzan says - You all have a beautiful weekend
Johns says - See if anyone wants a rose bush

Hugs,
Me

23 comments:

  1. Oh dear. I think you should have ordered him some Chinese soup.

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  2. Too funny. You guys crack me up. Thanks for the smiles with your this and that. Happy Friday and have a good week end. Get that pool open so I can come with my float and lounge in the pool. Seriously I need some pool time!
    Kris

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  3. Oh you gave me such a good laugh... "the answer is blowing in the wind." I've got rose bushes to plant too, thank goodness no pool, just a pond, which my son claims has it's on eco balance, when I say it needs to be clean.

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  4. I'll take the rose, but only if you deliver it personally!

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  5. will you plant it? I will put you up for the duration, but only if you promise not to sing.

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  6. You and John are so funny. That poor rose bush. I hope you planted it. Get a good drink, vodka on the rocks, then get into your pool and relax.
    Have a great weekend.
    Mary

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  7. I Love Lucy episodes, we have quite a few of them. Usually our's starts with him yelling at me about something I've bought to try to pretty up this pig's ear of a place, and I reply back "but Ricky!". Then I get the finger waved at me and I get told "you can't have it all!" It's downhill from there. We are 1/2 an acre away from any neighbours but I think they can still hear us. Get the damn rose planted and rename it for all the trouble it's caused. I'm still made that he whacked down a small tender oak that was in buried the overgrowth that I told himto handcut around. Probably took 10 yrs to get 3 feet high. Havea god weekend, have you got he armoire? Still waiting to hear back from 2 sellers. xo Patty

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  8. oh, don't you HATE those Witch Hazel hairs on the chinny-chin-chin!!? I look for them almost every day...then I skip a day....and the next time I look there's one long enough to use a curling iron on! And I went shopping all day with it shading my chin! *** Ah. The swimming pool. We should have been swimming in it for two months now, but haven't gotten our toes wet. Same issues.... can't get clear... or clean...or free of algae.... growing on the calcium deposits. Hundreds and hundreds of dollars worth of chemicals. Pitiful. But at least we could sit NEXT to it....with cold adult beverages....decorated with tiny little umbrellas from the Chinese restaurant, but I'm in Texas and it's too durn hot. *** I'd put up with a lot if I could even get my hubby to dig a hole or two for roses. Keep John. Better the devil you know, Suzan. :-)

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  9. Thanks for the songs in my head. Instead of one now I have 4. Not nice to do. Let's get down to the hair. April I turned 50. What's the deal? I know I have had a chin hair now and then which I used discover in the car when I could still drive. Hence, that's why a tweezer in there.

    Now I found one growing out of my cheek and one on my neck, YIKES. Like I don't have enough issues. So very frustrating

    Good luck with the pool

    Cindy

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  10. I LOVE that song by Lynne Anderson!!! I'll be singing it all day because it makes me happy :))) Thanks! I planted 5 rose bushes and they were all but gone thanks to the nasty deer here .... Grrrrr

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    Replies
    1. Well you just may be the only one that's ever thanked me for sticking a song in their heads LOL
      Oh that's too bad about the rose bushes - we have an extra one here...............lmho
      Happy weekend to you
      xoxoxo

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  11. You two need to be stand up comics. How do you think of all this stuff? You'd save money on a script writer. How can comedy be funny if it's not spontaneous? Great post Suzanne. Did that poor rose bush ever get planted? I keep out of things like that or hubs just might plant me. 24/7 together can get real old when it's too hot out and we're stuck in house for days on end. 100 or more out where we live. I hung some laundry yesterday thought my brains were fried, yuk. Feel like I need to take a shower 20 times a day, even dog and cat don't want to be out. Poor chickens must be roasting in all those blasted feathers. They go under our suburban to take dust baths, we can see them under there all lined up and hunkered down. Must be cool under there as they stay all day most of time. Too hot in their coop I guess. Happy Weekend

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    Replies
    1. Sadly, I LIVE all this stuff LMHO !!!
      Nope - the second rose bush is still not planted - ( but I'm thinking tomorrow it might be :)
      Holy cow - over 100 degrees - I think John would have just murdered me with the spade - really - he could never cope with digging in that heat !!!
      Stay cool -
      Happy weekend to you too !
      Hugs,
      Me

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  12. I must say; I think you and John are one of a kind.
    About your pool, you may have to start at square 1; draining the pool, scrubbing it really well and refill with water and add all new chemicals. It could also be your pump not working the way it should, check your screens, filter making sure they aren't plugged. Could be any number of things. My advice, have a pool expert come and check everything out for you and he would be able to tell you what needs to be done and what you should and shouldn't do.

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  13. I love reading your Friday's. About the hairs...I Feel the little bastards growing on my chin. I, too, carry a tweezer in my car..in total desperation. Enjoy your weekend. Ps we live by a lake so when we start shouting, the sound carries Everywhere! What fun!!

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  14. Good lord, I think I may have written this e-mail of yours. My dear sweet husband of 51 years, will also "pull" that on me (play on that word) a witches hair from my chin, when we are usually sitting and having a drink, when we go out. (which isn't often ) Going out I mean, but the chin hair, yep, they are there, (I guess) even tho I check daily...
    Geeess, I am not a monkey that needs grooming!! ..This is the same man, (when we are out) when I finish a sentence, I'll ask, did you hear what I said, are you listening.? . HA....What. what......Of course not.and asks me to.repeat what I'm talking about ,as if I speak in (monkey talk or something) .like he cares??Oh, and about the rose bush...pretty much the same thing happened here, but it was a lilac bush. No speaking at all, after that. Funny how they forget the incident an hour later, but I can remember for "years" later, every word that was said....I do believe men are really from Mars, or shipped in to our space, from far far away (no mans land perhaps) Gotta love them, because killing is against the rules....

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    Replies
    1. I'm not a monkey that needs grooming - I'm laughing my head off here Bonnie !!!
      The second rose bush is still not planted - I think we're " over " it though - so hopefully tomorrow LOL
      I remember every word too - and then I'm told that I'm not remembering properly!
      Have a great weekend
      xoxo

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  15. LOL ~ You make me laugh so hard. LOL
    Good luck with the pool.
    Hey, they got one of the bad guys! One more to go.
    Have a great weekend.
    Carla

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  16. Suzan you are hilarious! :D

    Oh gosh so much humor. Mind you it's 1:20 in the morning, I was collapsing but wanted to leave a comment to you. Well now, you got me all worked up and awake. And I am giggling (that's my low volume laugh so I don't wake up my 2 year old).

    I wish I could right as prolifically with so much humor. Rub some off on me? :)


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  17. So funny because whenEVER hubby and I do a project together we start out civil and at some point it turns ugly and I start to threaten to call the lawyer! Love to hear your stories!

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  18. Steve and I talk - all the time - since we spend most of every single day together. But, our conversations are nowhere near as fun as yours.

    Carol - the water is a gorgeous color today
    Steve - look, there's a dolphin
    Carol - I didn't see it!
    Steve - watch out for that dog poop
    Carol - why don't people clean up after their dogs?

    So on and so on!

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  19. OMGOSH!!! I haven't been here in forever!!! I don't know why, because when I DO come here, I always end up laughing. You are such a fun blogger Suzan. I hope the other rose bush gets put in the ground....without you in the hole.
    Debbie
    xo

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  20. Glad to hear that the two of you survived the day...and the rose bush planting. So is this a rose bush giveaway?? I prefer the Chinese battery-operated lantern, if we have a choice of prizes. ;-) And FYI, each morning, after brushing my teeth, I take care of any foliage adorning my chin. But I have a weird one that likes to pop up between my eyebrows. No kidding. What's with THAT??? Have a wonderful weekend, Suzan. Got to go water the vegetable garden before it gets too hot out.

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Due to a large amount of spam ( that I'm tired of going back to posts and deleting ) I'll be using comment moderation from now on !!!
Can I beat these spammers at their own game? Probably not - but I'm going
to try my damnedest !!!
xoxo