It's here everyone - another Tongue in Cheek Tuesday - except this time we want to hear a bunch of tongues wagging other than our own! In fact we get sick to death of hearing our own..................so we decided to make a " hen linky party " out of it..............
Share your stories - where do you hide your junk?
For my submission - I'm revisiting a post I did last summer - it really IS my dirty little secret.........
My Purse! Enjoy - and please feel free to submit your own ( we know there's a lot of you out there - no matter how much deny it - come on now - it's time to come CLEAN - you'll feel better for it - I promise LOL
My Dirty Little Secret ( and I do have one )
My shoulder has been hurting me badly - it's a recurring problem that happens periodically in the course of a year.................and I always figure it's from lugging furniture around because I can't wait for help - if no one's around I move it myself regardless of size or weight.
Anyway today I had to find something in my purse - and had to empty it to find it which is something I'm having to do more and more - and I simply cannot believe what I schlep around with me.
Unbelievable........................ridiculous to the point of (another ) disorder lurking in my life.
Totally unassuming looking, isn't it? You'd never know that I had a problem just looking at it, right?
Well lets take a peak inside, shall we?
I mean all we really need to have in that bag is our wallet ( even that is overflowing with useless shit! )
Sunglasses - perhaps some tissues - car - house keys - lipstick - period.
Everything else can stay at home until we get back, right?
Here's what I pulled out of mine this morning
WALLET
2 PAIRS OF SUNGLASSES ( because maybe I'll lose one pair? ) and the 2 gigantic cases that go with that
4 PACKS OF GUM - a couple of them only have 1 or 2 gums in them -
8 PENS - yeah 8 of them - because what if 7 of them ran out of ink?
MY PASSPORT - because you just never know when you may have to hop on a plane
6 HAND SANITIZERS - which I have to use just for putting my hands in this filthy bag
AT LEAST 30 PAINT SWATCHES all neatly fastened together with an elastic band
A PACKAGE OF BANDAIDS - keep in mind my kids are all grown -
TOOTH BRUSH - TOOTHPASTE - DENTAL FLOSS ( 4 pks of dental floss )- ok the dental floss is a good thing but I have never, not once, in the 25 years I have been carrying these items - brushed my teeth
in a public restroom - I know people do it and good for them - but I have simply never done so,
nor do I suppose I ever will - what the hell do I keep carrying them for -
6 LIPSTICKS - starting to notice a pattern here? I can never just have one of anything
3 EYELINERS
4 EYESHADOWS -
2 TAMPONS - have not had a period in years - but hey you never know - the clock may
reverse one day - and I may be wearing white - and Oh God - where are those emergency
tampons when I need them?
AN EMERGANCY KOTEX PAD - what the hell? I never even used them when I could have -
but again they can be used as a bandage in an emergency - but I swear I never put that in my purse.
AN ADDRESS BOOK - lmao - who the hell has an address book in their purse anymore - and it's
so old most of the numbers no longer exist - and they're all on my cell phone anyways.
CELL PHONE
3 COMPACT MIRRORS ( so I can see my nose from all angles? )
2 RER TRAIN TICKETS FROM.....................Paris - last trip was 2 years ago
3 EMERY BOARDS
ENOUGH CHANGE TO PROBABLY PAY MY MORTGAGE OFF - in pennies
A GROCERY BAG WITH A PAIR OF FLIP FLOPS ( and the car always has 3 or 4 pairs
of shoes laying on the floor )
A PAINT LID OPENER ( so that's where it was - I've been using a butter knife to open my
paint cans )
20 REDUNDANT BUSINESS CARDS - the ones I should have in my purse are on my desk
Do you think this may be the source of my shoulder problem?
And it gets better
Whenever John and I go out - he always asks if he can put his cigars in my purse - and I always
think Ok - this just may be the straw that broke Suzan's back - literally.
I've gotten better - when I was younger I used to carry my curling iron around with me - and now
I'll let you in on another secret - dating myself dreadfully again but here goes,
When I was 5 or 6 Chatty Cathy was a BIG thing...................and I used to stuff her in my school
bag and carry her with me to school and back placed in between my books, so this problem is not a new one-
It's time for change Suzan -
I'm cleaning out my purse today..................I think at this point it's the only way I'm ever going to lose
weight anyway
There's absolutely no reason to carry everything but the kitchen sink in it anymore.
Keep in mind that when you link up today - your post will appear on all 5 blogs
( so you REALLY will be airing your dirty laundry ) and to see my fellow bloggers posts on this subject
simply click on the below links - you're guaranteed a laugh!
Kirb Appeal - Kirby ( Krazy Kirby )
Mellywood's Mansion - Mel ( Mad Mel )
Silo Hill Farm - Danni ( Delusional Danni )
The Bliss Ranch - Bliss ( Bonkers Bliss )
and of course there's me Simply Sane Suzy..................what am I doing with all of these nutcases?
