X-mas in July? Bah, Humbug ..................

There's a Christmas in July link party going on right now -
I was dreading the conversation that was going to happen in this house while I prepared for this party..........
And here's how it went.

Suzan says - John, do you think you could go to the storage unit and just bring me back one box of Christmas ornaments?
John says - Pardon me?
Suzan says - There's a Christmas in July party going on and I have to make something Christmas-y
John says - Have you totally lost your mind?  It's 180 degrees out there
John says - What the hell is Christmas in July - only a blogger could have invented that
Suzan says - DO NOT TELL ME you've never heard of Christmas in July?
John says - NEVER
Suzan says- what about camping when you were a kid
John says - there was NO camping in England - we played cricket in the summer - we did NOT wait for Father Christmas to show up
Suzan says - Who the hell is Father Christmas?
John says - Your Santa Claus............
Suzan says - I thought he was Santa Claus everywhere
Suzan says - What a ridiculous name for Santa Claus
John says - Yeah - just about as ridiculous as celebrating Christmas in July.............
Suzan says - Can you just................
John says - NO - I'm not doing it - I'm not rummaging for an hour in this heat looking for wreaths.........
John says - forget about it -
and he heads for the door
Suzan hopefully says - You going?
John says - Nope - I'm going to the park
John says - To have a Christmas cigar - see you later...................

And that was that - he left me - JUST WHEN I NEEDED HIM MOST...................

What to do?  What to do?
I have 2 Christmas ornaments in my bedroom drawer - my panty drawer - had no idea why they were there but do you see how funny life is?
They were meant to be there - so that I could pull them out and do something magical for Christmas in July :)

One of them ended up on a candle holder -

ok that's just pitiful I know - but it's really really hot here............my brain is lazy

But I know I can do better than this - I mean after all - everyone has their glue guns out - their saws and hammers and craft supplies - this is embarrassing really............
Let's see

I can turn this

into this !!!!!!

hmmm - still sorely lacking - I'm definitely going to have to up the ante here
maybe this???

Meet Giselle - the blue nosed Giraffe ???

Now you may think I took the easy way out here - but believe me if you've ever tried to balance a Christmas ornament on a Giraffe's nose - you'd be pretty impressed !!!
It looks all Christmas-y in my living room now!!!

Can't wait for a Star Wars themed party -
Meet Princess Leia :)

Ok so here's the part where I shamelessly plug Christmas things I made..............because you can't walk away today thinking I'm inept in that department

I made this ( HERE )

and this ( HERE )

and this artwork

and these ( HERE ) 8 of them in fact

so it's not that I CAN'T do it - it's just that my face can't be melting onto the project when I do them............

AND my earmuffs go off to the incredible bloggers that actually came up with Christmas projects and executed them and put me completely to shame...............

God help me - I'm singinng O Holy Night at my desk
Ho Ho Ho

John comes back from his walk ( and Christmas Cigar )
John says - SO..............what's for dinner - Turkey and all the trimmings?

Have a good one all!

Sharing With!!!
My Salvaged Treasures

The WORST furniture Painting day of my life.............

Good morning everyone - and I'm forcing myself to say that because it's not a good morning.
At all.
Last night I started painting this which by the way is much larger than it appears -
Anyways - I didn't want to paint it the same old - same old...................

So I mixed Paris Grey ( chalk paint ) and Old Violet ( I think that's what it's called - not sure now - and you'll know why in a minute ) anyways I didn't measure ( I always measure ) because the mixture came to a whole tin ) I definitely had enough to do two of these end tables and 1 ladies dresser - no problemo........

I couldn't sleep so this was going on at roughly 3 o'clock in the morning...........
It made the most gorgeous color - a light grey / lavender - really pretty!
Here's a photo of it next to regular Paris Grey

I painted the one end table - and then decided I should put the paint tin on the table because it's dangerous with the dog to leave it on the floor and I'm very careful with my paint.
I've never had an accident.
I paint furniture in my house after all so I HAVE to be very diligent with these things -
So off I go to the dining room and promptly trip on the area carpet - and I can actually FEEL the paint slipping from my hand - like slow motion - BUT I'm not panicked because I have another hand that can grab it, right?
Wrong -
Terribly wrong.
Dreadfully wrong.
Because although it feels like it's happening in slow motion - it's really only a blink of an eye

while I'm playing court jester and sort of juggling it in two hands - I see it land on the wall and I think - well at least it didn't touch the chair - and that's not so bad - but now paint has spilled down the sides of the paint can and my hands are slip.............................

sliding

away

( you know the nearer the destination )

the more you're slip sliding away.................

And after that minute passes I start freaking out - OH MY GOD - OH MY GOD - OH MY GOD..........

John's in bed obviously - and I'm running up and down the hall filling a bucket - OH MY GOD OH MY GOD - and I'm on my hands and knees and wringing the cloth - and then running back to the sink to put fresh water in the bucket - and every time I run back I notice more and more paint on the hall floor..........
OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD

Maybe it had something to do with the next photo...................half a quart people - of CHALK PAINT - gold.
I actually scooped up some paint with a spoon off the carpet - in a house where I have a dog that's shedding enough hair to create a new carpet to replace the one I've ruined.................
DO NOT LOOK AT MY BUNIONS......................or how white I am - I haven't sat in the sun at all this summer - but this is giving me an idea - I may just paint myself with COCO - for an instant tan.

It was also dripping off my nightgown.
I have half a quart left................to do another table and a ladies dresser..............it may or may not have dog hair incorporated into the finish.
Did I mention I did not follow a recipe this time?

And on a final note - you know you're a blogger when..................

In the midst of a crisis the first thing you run for is your camera.
( and ONLY a blogger could ever possibly understand that ) 

and then sit down to write up a post.................

nice color though, right?

UPDATE:
It's the next day - I've just gotten up -   
and the first thing out of John's mouth is this ( I swear to you ) 

" you know you really shouldn't leave paint tins on the floor - it's dangerous "

and for a moment - the briefest moment you can imagine - really it may have been only seconds even - I thought of smacking him in the head..................

SERENITY NOW.................

Time to Party!!!
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