Sunday, June 1, 2014

Thank you Tree................

THERE'S A TREE OUTSIDE MY BEDROOM WINDOW
NOTHING SPECIAL REALLY
JUST A TREE



But I watch daily as it starts to bud - and I think how beautiful it will be when it's in all it's full glory - we'll have a dappled curtain of privacy created by nature and I'm grateful.
I feel the breeze from the rustling leaves in the evening and I think how perfect a spot this tree was
planted in - it'll allow breezes into the bedroom on hot summer nights and I'm grateful.
I look down as I make my bed - noticing the shade it creates by the side of the house - outside the backyard and I make plans to create a secret garden and I'm grateful.


Each morning it seems to be a little more full and as slow as the process may seem at times it happens rather quickly - one day you hear your better half excitedly shouting

" Sue - Sue - come quickly - you won't believe this "

And you grab your camera - ( because you're a blogger and well, that's just what blogger's do )


And you stand in awe - so silently that you can almost hear this beauty blossoming - and marvel that THIS belongs to you - this magnificent gift - this totally unexpected magnificent gift and all of a sudden you know - you just know - that as much as you've been complaining about this house and how you've taken on more than you can chew and how the renovations are maybe just a little more than you bargained for and all of the nasty surprises that come with buying an old - very old house all come down to this one singular moment and you're moved - almost to the point of tears - and you and your husband stand arm in arm and gaze at it like 2 small wonderous children - and you smile at each other and think..................

We're home.
It doesn't matter what the inside looks like for the next few months - not when the outside looks like this.
We're home.
This is where we're meant to be at this time in our lives - everything happens for a reason - and this tree was
planted here - in this exact spot - so that one day I could sit beneath it with a favorite book and a glass of freshly made lemonade - with my feet up and the world resting on the shoulders of my glorious tree - instead of mine.
We're home.
Even if the bathrooms need to be gutted and the floors still need to be done - and the ceilings are a disaster and there are far too many rooms left to paint and the windows are dangerously close to falling out of their frames................
We have a tree that speaks to us
and that beckons us towards a little peace and quiet -
that tells us it's ok to take a break
that it's not going anywhere
that all it needed was time and patience ( much like the house )
and most importantly it tells us, that no, we did not make a mistake when we signed the papers.

I think of a family that planted a seed long before I was born and I am dangerously close to crying now - not frustrated tears, not tears of despair or grief or sadness - of which there have been too many since purchasing this house - not even menopausal tears - these are tears of gratitude................



I think that I shall never see 
A poem lovely as a tree.

A tree whose hungry mouth is prest
Against the earth's sweet flowing breast;

A tree that looks at God all day,
And lifts her leafy arms to pray;

A tree that may in summer wear
A nest of robins in her hair;

Upon whose bosom snow has lain;
Who intimately lives with rain.
I walk around the yard in wonderment at all this majestic beauty, taking photos as I go, looking up, always looking up - because after all that's the place where hope and inspiration and peace come from.







I snap one more photo of the cherry tree


and go to where I store my paintbrushes with renewed energy - with a replenished spirit - with something that closely resembles a skip in my walk  and I think how wonderful it is to be me right now - today - owner of this ramshackle house.

Thank you Tree -
I'm grateful
And will paint my next piece pink in your honor 

POEMS ARE MADE BY FOOLS LIKE ME
BUT ONLY GOD CAN MAKE A TREE

JOYCE KILMER......................

For finish the tree didn't bear much blossom - just enough to restore hope - but maybe at the end of the day that's all it was meant to do after all - to remind me that when things seems too big for me to handle on my own - I simply need to look up.

Have a wonderful day everyone
Take a moment to look up at some point today - past the trees if necessary.
( and give thanks )
Much love,
Moi

Sharing with !!!
Between Naps on the Porch                       Coastal Charm                       Domestically Speaking
A Stroll thru Life                                        Stone Gable                           An Extraordinary Day
Kathe with an E                                         The DIY Dreamer                  Savvy Southern Style
DIY by Design                                          Adorned from Above             Ivy & Elephants
Shabby Art Boutique                                 Uncommon Design                 Under the Table & Dreaming

Saturday, May 31, 2014

O.C.D. ( c )


I have a mild case of it................I say mild because it used to be much worse.

I can remember being so relieved when they finally labelled it - and then sick with embarrassment that I actually had a disorder ( I've since learned to " own " my disorders - of which I have too many to count
simply because if I didn't I'd drive myself insane )
If any of you have noticed I usually always do three exclamation points and that's because I have 3 kids.
There you have it - if you ever only see one, you now know it was a struggle to move past it lol.

Anyway I've discovered that practically everyone on the planet has some form of it.

I used to put my cups a certain way in the cupboard - until I saw SLEEPING WITH THE ENEMY
( well as much of it as I could stand - I don't do thriller's very well ) and there was a scene in the movie where the sicko notices cups are not put the way he wants them - so for a very long time I purposely 
did NOT put the cups a certain way - AND it took quite a long time to realize that being very diligent about NOT putting the cups a certain way was just as much an obsessively compulsive thing to do.  Trying to place them all messily took time and effort ( but if anyone looked in the cupboard my secret would be safe lol )
Ok - so the reason I'm telling you this is because of this conversation the other night when I was refolding the sheets John had put in a ball in the linen closet.

This is the way I like the linen closet to look - it makes me less anxious about the utter chaos living in a reno brings


Because if the only place my world has any semblance of order is in the linen closet - then the linen
closet MUST ALWAYS LOOK LIKE THIS.
It's completely crucial that in the midst of mayhem I can walk in here once in a while and feel peace.
It doesn't even matter if John " get's " that or not - it just IS.  I don't know if it's part of the disorder or the saddest commentary in the world - I only know that I must never - and I mean never - walk into it and see this ( well at least until a few more rooms have been done and then it wouldn't matter at all as much )


Because my sanity is hanging in the air right now -
It's enough that we just discovered we owe the government a new car basically
And the house is nowhere finished with reno's
Or that I'm drowning in furniture to paint and get rid of
If you add a rumpled sheet or blanket to that I'm afraid I'll slip off the edge.

Suzan says - Just leave the sheets for me to fold from now on please, ok?
John says - I think you have O.C.D.C.
Suzan says - and what would that be John?
John says - You never heard of it?  It's where you
Suzan interrupts him -  you mean O.C.D. the disorder
John says - What's the difference?  You know what I mean
Suzan says - You're asking someone with O.C.D. what the difference is?
Suzan playfully pushes him across the bed
John says - Cut it out - I'm watching T.V.
Suzan waits a little - and pushes him with the other hand
John says - WHAT THE HELL?
Suzan says - that, sweetheart, is O.C.D.
John says - Okay - enough (*&#*&@)*
Suzan says - And you may just have a mild form of Tourettes.........................

O.C.D.C
OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE DISORDER,  CRAP !!!

Have a good one all - though I have a LOT of rooms to scrape old remnants of carpet from - and windows to paint - and ceilings and walls for that matter - I think I'm going to get in that linen closet and make it shine LMHO

Hugs
( and than another one - so that it's an even number )
The Happy Blogger
Or the
Completely    
Demented one anyway