Tuesday, January 6, 2015

A hole in a tiny heart.....................

Once upon a time there were.......................

2 Brothers.
One was frail - born with a hole in his tiny heart - that took many operations to correct.
He was coddled - over protected - and over compensated for.
His brother was more robust - far healthier - and like is so often the case - overlooked because his brother was a constant source of worry to their parents.

2 Brothers.
One quite spoiled because of circumstances.
One always trying to find the love the parents seemed to mostly show the other.
One constantly praised.
One always in " trouble " for something or other .

2 Brothers.
One very articulate - able to speak his mind in whatever fashion he chose - without any scolding.
The other developing a stutter trying to get his broken words out as quickly as he could - before the attention was inevitably transferred to his little brother.
Mostly being told to " spit it out for God's Sakes ! "

2 Brothers.
The little boy with the hole in his tiny heart, thrived.
He married a girl whom his parents approved of.
The healthier boy married a girl who was Catholic - the wrong religion completely.
He was always doing the wrong thing...............

Until his first child was born - the first grandchild !
A girl !
The first girl born on his Father's side in too many years to count !
He finally did something right.
And the joy that this brought to the parents slowly erased the painful memories of
a boy who was denied the emotional connections he so desperately needed.
His stutter disappeared.
He walked a little taller - the future was bright and there was a whole lifetime ahead of them all.
To make peace - to forgive - to embrace - to erase..................

Except there wasn't.
The little boy with the hole in his heart is a strong healthy man today - 78 years later.
The healthier boy?
Well he was gone not long after his 29th birthday - because what they didn't know - couldn't know -
was that a brain aneurysm beats a hole in a tiny heart.

He left a widow of 24 years old to raise children as a single Mother.

His Father drove into a brick wall the day he lost him - an unsuccessful suicide attempt.
He fell to his knees in the hospital screaming " No God - Please No God - I can't bear it "
He had to be sedated but when he finally stood up people swore he was half the size forever more, the stoop in his back was so pronounced.
His Mother had to be restrained from throwing herself in the grave at his funeral - not being able to bear being separated from her first born.
All that love..................from the core of their being - ( and there is no doubt it was there ) being expressed just a little too late.

They showered his children with more love then they probably showed even the boy with 2 holes in his tiny heart.
They were coddled - over protected - and over compensated for -  of which they had much experience.
They were fiercely protective of them - they spoiled them and loved them unconditionally - perhaps in hopes that their Son could witness it from beyond.

But his passing left a hole in each of their hearts.................that no operation could fix.

They've long since joined their boy -
The little boy with the hole in his tiny heart went on to have a very successful career.
The widowed bride remarried.
And that first born grandchild?
She has a blog where she sometimes shares just a little too much............................

He was their Son -
I am his daughter -
At 55 I've been on this earth almost double the time he was granted
I wish I could hug him.
Just hug him.
He left a tiny hole in my heart too.

A tough lesson in the importance of loving unconditionally.

Have yourselves a wonderful day
I'll fill you in on how Mother Nature bit me after my last chat on how Spring like it was here in Montreal
AND how my new camera died.................( which is why you're left with only words for today's post )
Much love
( unconditional of course ! )

Thursday, January 1, 2015

A Friday Chat ( about this and that )

My favorite part of a Turkey dinner is the leftovers - I love everything Turkey Leftover -

Hot Turkey Sandwiches
Cold Turkey Sandwiches
Turkey a la King
Turkey Soup
Club sandwiches
Turkey casserole, anything really.

I decided to chop some up to make us some Turkey Salad Sandwiches.................

Suzan says - I'm going to make Turkey Salad for us
John says - Oh that sounds great !
John says - Don't mix lettuce in mine please
Suzan says - WHAT are you talking about?
John says - Don't chop up lettuce in mine
Suzan says - I don't chop up lettuce and mix it in!
John says - So why's it called Turkey Salad?
Suzan says - It's like an Egg salad sandwich - or Chicken salad - or Tuna salad - except it's with Turkey
John says - What's in it then?
Suzan says - Turkey - onion - celery - ( I don't even mention the mayo because that's a N.O. if he knows about it )
John says - Ok just skip the onion and celery please

Shaking my head I go into the kitchen - what can I put for crunch?
I start chopping up red pepper really quickly before he walks in .................too late

John says - Oh - no red pepper in mine
Suzan says -Why didn't you just say you wanted plain turkey between 2 slices of bread?
John says - Well it doesn't have to be plain - I just don't want the stuff you mentioned in it
Suzan says - THERE'S NOTHING ELSE I CAN PUT IN IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Later on in the week I said I was going to make a couple of cheese omelets -
John says - I LOVE THEM !!!
Suzan says - phew finally
John says - Would you mind not putting cheese in mine though?

I'm a bad flyer.......................
Well since 9/11 anyway - I don't recall being scared before that really but since then?  Terrible.
John gets on a plane and promptly falls asleep - almost immediately - he is totally relaxed -
So that leaves it up to me to try to spot out all the bad guys on the plane - you know, the ones that are going to jump up at any moment and scream ALLAH AKBAR in my face?
Just call me Agent 99.
It makes for a horrible experience to be that paranoid ( once I convinced myself that an older woman was a terrorist -when she started screaming at me in Arabic that she wanted the window seat - out of nowhere - SCREAMING - the seat was in fact mine - the stewardess came over immediately and " bumped " me up to business class when I started screaming back in terror - but as I sat in business class very comfortably I fretted - who was going to keep an eye on that lady? )
And it's not just for myself - I'm terrified when anyone I know gets on a plane actually.
So these planes that disappear?
Beyond anything I can stand.....................I replay the scenario over and over in my mind.
Gut wrenching news.
Those poor, poor people waiting in airports for updates - knowing deep down that there just can't be any good coming out of it.

Which reminds me of another time.................we were coming home from St. Martaan in the Carribean.
Not long after 9/11
I  was a nervous wreck - especially since we were in Manhattan the week before it happened - and one of our plans had been to go to THAT restaurant -
As we were walking up the stairs to board the plane ( coming home )  I had a terrible thought - and I stopped halfway up and told John I couldn't get on the plane................
He pushed me and told me to " just stop it " ( he's very compassionate like that )
So I did - and boarded the plane - I couldn't justifiably just stay in the Carribbean indefinitely..................
But I did so very reluctantly.  Each upward step was forced.
It was 3 seats per aisle - and there was a lady beside me who started a conversation.
She explained that she was a Travel Agent - and flew at the very least once a month..............safest way to travel she assured me when I told her I was feeling a little apprehensive.
In the midst of the conversation - mid sentence - there was some turbulence - terrible actually - the worst I'd ever experienced - and all of a sudden she went into a " duck " position ( which was completely alien to me )
I looked at John, terrified and reminded him that I hadn't wanted to get on the plane - while she calmly told me to get in the proper position because the plane WAS going to crash - she knew these things apparently.
She had experience, she told me -
And so I did what I was told........................
When I think back to it I could die of embarrassment because no one else did it - just the two of us - with John angrily telling her to " stop it " that she was terrifying all the passengers.................and her screaming back " to duck "
The two of us - OMG - the two of us crouched over - with our hands over our heads - what the hell was that going to do exactly?
And John angrily staring ahead shaking his head.
Anyway after what seemed like an eternity - she resumed a sitting position and matter of factly, said " false alarm "
I didn't speak to her for the rest of the flight LMHO -
Nut case.
And 2 nut cases should never be placed in the same row - beside each other.
I feed off that type of energy.
If someone's laughing - I laugh
If someone's crying - I cry
If someone's in a duck position on a plane ...............................

If any one out there is a doubter of climate change - please book a trip to Canada this winter................YOU NEED to see this with your own eyes.
I can remember a time when once January arrived you started the count down - winter was almost half over at that point - although the most vicious part of it was still to come - it at least felt like you could see the light at the end of the tunnel.
It really hasn't started.
We had a glorious dump of snow a couple of weeks ago - and there's not a trace of it left -
Apparently 85% of Canada is still green - unbelievable - it truly is !
Montreal was so famous for their snow that they had the largest snow removal system on the continent of North America - often lending it out to our American neighbors.
It's unheard of to look out and see tidy lawns at this time of year.
I think I saw our ground hog come out the other day - he's confused the poor thing - he thought he'd slept in till Spring - missing Ground Hog day entirely.

Take a second to watch this - it's hilarious !  ( and scary at the same time because it's happening )
I think I've posted it before - but it makes me laugh

AND here's Montreal ( a couple of days ago ) it's snowing lightly as I type - but again it's supposed to be warm on Sunday with rain so it won't stay

I can't recall a winter like this in.............................ever .
Although it could all change over night really.

I'm thinking of starting a linky party this month - so get all of your projects ready !

Suzan says - I think I'm going to start a linky party!
John says - What in God's name is a stinky party?
Suzan says - A. L.I.N.K.Y PARTY !!!
Suzan says - That's where people come and link up their projects - or anything - they can link up anything really
John says - You'd better be careful you know
Suzan says - Why?
John says - Well you don't want people linking from Porn Sites

But maybe I do have to point it out?
No porn links allowed....................

It's 2015 -
2000 and freaking 15
It sounds like something out of a sci fi movie to me - even George Orwell couldn't see into the future further than 1984.................
If you were born in 59 - 2015 was the year that we were supposed to be using flying cars - like the Jetson's ( since that was our only point of reference )
Not a Honda civic OR a van that won't start when it's too cold outside.
I was supposed to have a Rosy taking care of all my household chores....................so I could paint furniture
Bonus points if you remember Rosy the sassy Robot

There was nothing on the other night - so I resorted to watching a show on a morbidly obese man awaiting an operation.
It was very sad actually - not good television - but sad none the less.
John came in and watched it for 5 minutes.
John says - Do you think we could watch a House or a Murder instead?
John says - This is sickening to watch - garbage.
Suzan says - We've already seen both the House Hunters AND the murder story...............
John says - I'm going to play poker...............

Later on that night I walked into the bedroom and saw him totally absorbed in something on t.v.
I sat down beside him to see a woman with breasts the size of basketballs .................( and that's not me joking - they were literally the size of basketballs )
Suzan says - What are you watching?
John says - My Strange Addiction ....................she's searching for a doctor to give her larger implants.
John says - She's addicted to breast implants
John says - The other one is addicted to eating dryer sheets apparently.
John says - Where are you going?
Suzan says - I think I'm going to start playing on line poker too..................

A police chief in Georgia is on leave while they investigate.
He shot his wife by accident.


Bang - OMG Honey - I'm so sorry................
Whoa - Are you still standing?
Bang - OMG Honey - I'm so sorry................

He lost me with the second shot.

If I have to have a " word " for 2015 - I'm going to pick " procrastinate " since every time I pick a word I do the exact opposite it seems.

I have to go pack up Christmas now - and pick up some paint for that Dining room set tomorrow -
Have a wonderful weekend one and all !
Much love,