Thursday, October 22, 2015

A FRIDAY CHAT ( about this & that )

Hi !  Good Morning !
Come in - come in - no that's ok -  you can leave your shoes on ( I haven't washed the floors in weeks )
I shouldn't admit that - but it's just the way it is - too much going on around here to worry about clean floors.

Crisp enough out there for you?

I was thinking about why we call Autumn the Fall..........................
Do you think it's because all the leaves start to Fall?
( if that's the case why don't we call Spring - Rise? _
And does that mean I'm in the Fall of my life ( because parts of my body that are supposed to be perky are starting to fall also )
The summer of my life were such incredible years - maybe that's why it's my favorite season?
I hate raking.
Leaves and/or boobs.

( but I hate shoveling even least we're not there yet - but at the rate mine are growing I WILL need a shovel to pack them into a bra )

SO...................speaking of everything " falling " a girlfriend of mine has been trying to get me to join Yoga for a couple of years now -
I've always had an excuse - for 2 years straight I have managed to find an excuse every single time for why I can't go  - working on the house - painting furniture - kids are coming over for dinner - I don't feel well - in grown toe nail - really any excuse would do at all.
Until I completely ran out of them .
Until I realized I'm waking up in the morning with more aches and pains that I can stand.
Until it dawned on me that at this rate I'll be finding excuses until the day I die.
This week I went out and bought a pair of yoga pants - just in case type of thing..............
And then I painted my toe nails ( just to let you know how deeply I was considering this )

And since I want to be able to eventually lift that leg higher than the toilet bowl - I ACTUALLY WENT TO A YOGA CLASS !!!
I think I may be hooked - I REALLY enjoyed it !
A facebook friend told me about a new exercise class so I googled it and we have it in Montreal - it's called
PURE BARRE - and looks amazing!
Here's the one in a historical building - win/win !!!

Eventually I may even learn how to take a selfie !

This is a comment I received this week on my blog

Dịch vụ làm bằng đại học uy tín giá rẻ tại tphcm và hà nội

làm bằng đại học
làm bằng
làm bằng đại học giá rẻ
làm bằng đại học tại tphcm
làm bằng đại học tại hà nội
làm bằng đại học không cần đặt cọc

Well !
Dịch vụ làm bằng đại học uy tín giá rẻ tại tphcm và hà nội - to you too !
One too many bangs going on there.
Bang bang you're deleted.

Remember that holey pumpkin I took from my daughter's house?

Well I noticed the other day that the " lid " had blown off so I bent down to pick it up
( and 5 Hail Mary's ).............there was a squirrel sitting INSIDE the freaking thing - munching away idly and looking out at me from one of the holes like it was his personal window. ( had their been curtains on it I think he'd have simply closed them )
I screamed and ran into the house and bolted the door as quick as my fingers could do it - like there was a murderer right behind me...
The neighbors have probably never heard so much screaming in their lives because I seem to do it quite frequently in my " new " location.
Anyway I sat there banging and smashing at the window trying to scare it off.
A neighbor walked by and mistook my frantic banging as a way to say " HI ! "
She waved back enthusiastically.
Next time I'll have a sign that I can hold up - saying HELP !
I wish I were as brave as the squirrels that live here.
Most squirrels see a human approach and run.
I see a squirrel approach and run.
I've empowered them with my phobias.
And there's nothing worse than an empowered squirrel - they SMELL the fear - just trust me on that one.
They walk around here like little muscle men with their chests puffed out and their arms outreached -
And they look angry - I just know they're saying " Hey girl - ya wanna piece of me? "
If it were legal they'd probably pack little guns.

Last weekend I was outside on a ladder - trying to get another window painted - beat the clock so to speak
as light flakes of snow were falling on me !

I'm a procrastinator in some areas - without a doubt.
But John's a procrastinator in EVERY area - seriously - every single area of his world.

It's kind of frustrating living in a fixer upper with that attitude ( which I think was the attitude of the previous owners as well - except they found suckers to buy it - I doubt we'd be that lucky )

Suzan says - I wanted to get all this done by the end of September.
John says - What done?
Suzan says - The windows - the shutters - putting the outdoor furniture away - etc.
John says - You know who you remind me of?
Suzan says - WHO?  ( more than certain he's going to say Kate from the Taming of the Shrew or some such bitchy character............)
John says - All those people that would not cross the ocean when Moses parted the sea.


John says - All those people that would not cross the ocean when Moses parted the sea.

If any of you can see a connection there - PLEASE enlighten me - because even after he tried to explain it to me I was clueless.

John says in a squeaky voice - while wringing his hands -  OH WE'LL NEVER BE FINISHED IN TIME - WE'RE DOOMED !

3 things you should know about me.
I don't have a squeaky voice.
I never wring my hands.
I don't think we're doomed.
Not at all.
But like Kate from the Taming of the Shrew I'm furious !

Suzan says - I have no clue what you're talking about
John says - Read the bible
Suzan says - I KNOW the story - it just doesn't correlate to my wishing we'd finished our Fall chores before it started to SNOW
John says - If you don't get it - I can't explain it to you
Suzan says - Ok Jimmy Swaggart - let's get some work done - shall we?

But now I'm worried to be honest with you.
He's bringing our conversations to a whole new level and it's way beyond me obviously.
Unless he figured the conversation would allow work to stop for another day while I tried to figure it out?
AND I do have faith that winter is right around the corner and we're nowhere near finished.

John went to Toronto for a few days on business this week.

Suzan says - Did you book your room already?
John says - Nah - I'm just going to stay at a motel
Suzan says - Even if it's a motel you should book it you know
John says - Nah - it's a motel for crying out loud - people come and go
Suzan says - Yes that's the concept of hotels and motels - people come and go
Suzan says - PLEASE book a room !
John says - Here you go again..................I don't HAVE to book a room -
Suzan says - PLEASE book a room !
John says - Yah yah - ok

He got to Toronto - saw all his appointments and called me around 7 p.m.

John says - I don't want you to panic
Suzan panics immediately - which he knew I would - why would he start a conversation with that line????
John says - The whole city is booked - I can't get a room

I called dozens of hotels from Montreal -
He drove all over the city for a couple of hours looking and finally found one................

John says - I TOLD you not to panic - I found a room
John says - For under a hundred dollars - it's a steal
Suzan says - But you spent 100 dollars in gas looking for one...............................

I have this horrible vision of some flea bitten dump but he'd never admit that to me
Anyway he's obviously one of those people that would have ran through the parted about faith !

And in real news
I got the window done...................but between you and I?
John's right.
I would NEVER have darted across that narrow path that Moses made in the middle of the sea.
I freeze when I'm terrorized - ( now  you know how proud I was of myself for being able to run in AND barricade myself into my house over the squirrel fiasco ) so I would have been left standing in the middle of the ocean while the waters closed back up and swallowed me whole. ( making a nice tasty snack for a whale and unlike Jonah I'd NEVER survive 3 days in the belly of one- no way - there's some things I just " know ":.
 I'd be the one standing on the shore waving my hanky and calling out
 " Bon Voyage - send me a post card when you reach the other side will ya?  Oy vey Godspeed ! "
That's the only part of the movie in The Ten Commandments that I absolutely CANNOT watch - that's how much it frightens me - even the celluloid version is too much for me.
In fact just writing about it makes me weak in the knees.
I have immense respect - however - for anyone that would.
AND for people that get all their Fall chores done by Fall - I have great respect for them too.
So there IS that connection I suppose....................

I still have 4 windows to do - wash - paint - paint shutters I'm going to leave you now
Have a wonderful one all !
PLEASE stay away from parting bodies of water if at all possible - I simply can't bear the thought of any of you running through them.............
OMG - I feel like throwing up


  1. Oh NO!! Thanks for leaving the sweetest comment on my blog post. Haunted House.
    Attached to it was UPS ???? just thought you would like to know!

  2. ***gigglesnorts*** I can just see you screaming, then running from the squirrel! He probably just wanted to say "Thank you for this fine pumpkin with the great windows."
    Remember, they only attack if they are rabid!
    (sorry for the new nightmare)

    No snow yet, but we had our first pretty good frost this A.M. ~ this weekend I have to get all the rest of the ceramic pots to safety.
    And I finally had to turn on the heater ~

  3. I love reading your Friday Chats. You always make me giggle.

  4. I love yoga, you will too. I've been at it for about 5 years, I am now 69 and it has been fantastic for my body...really helped my balance, planter fachitis...etc. This video you shared is amazing...I would love that class.

    1. Oh my gosh Karen - I keep forgetting what that's called - that plantar fachitis - I have it too !!!
      You don't know how relieved I am to hear it helps that particular pain - it's God - Awful !

  5. God I love your Friday posts, they are the highlight of the week!!! I\can't believe he didn't book a room! OY!!!

  6. How can even your fears make me laugh? I shouldn't, I know, but Suzan, I am laughing at the whole squirrel and parting water things. Oh girl! Don't worry, I'd drag you through so you wouldn't drown. But John's comment...nope I don't understand it either. Bruce is like that...won't book ahead of time. At least, he was until I had a major meltdown one time. Ha. Good luck getting your windows done!

  7. I love your Friday chats, your week always seem so much more fun and interesting than the rebuild mess here. You look fab in your yoga attire, enjoy your classes and try the Barre clases for fun. Enjoy your weekend! xo Patty

    1. Well Patty - it's a pretty sad commentary that you find my life fun LMHO !!!
      Thanks - I had a blast with yoga - hooked ( I think )
      You have a wonderful weekend too!

  8. :-)) As always you made me laugh.
    Have a great weekend.

  9. Oh my goodness! I needed a laugh today. Thanks for sharing.

  10. OK, Suzan...first, there's NO water around these parts so you don't have to worry about me running through any parting water, drought and fires you know! Also, there is no Fall, so there are NO chores to finish before end of Fall--NO rain, NO snow, NO weather... just hell-fire and brimstone and hot winds...Oh yeah, and now rattle snakes coming down everywhere with little cups begging for water! Also Venomous SEA SNAKES down by the coast! I am glad I live 20 miles inland! I have plenty on my hands trying to walk my dogs while dodging Rattlers and other snakes looking for water, not to mention coyotes and other fauna! All this because the Pacific Ocean has warmed up so much that all of this tropical stuff is happening! There is the biggest hurricane on record gearing up in the Pacific next to Puerto Vallarta Mexico which always gives us high humidity and HEAT, but no rain, (Texas will get that). This is a DESERTt for God's sake!
    Happy to hear that you enjoyed your Yoga class! You are full of excuses like me...I'm creative that way! You are very pretty, and very young in your photo!
    Oh, yes one last thing...if those squirrels lived in the USA, they WOULD be packing heat! Apparently too many people in the USA need their egos boosted so they have to carry guns,( for protection, wink-wink), they claim!
    Again, you made me snort my coffee reading your blog! (This time I knew better than to laugh my shorts off, so I pinned them onto my top!) You're so funny, Lucy, and John is!
    Love you,
    Laura, et al

    1. LMHO Laura !!! It's not really funny at all ( your water situation ) but you gotta laugh or you'd cry, right?
      Just hell fire and brimstone and hot winds with a chance of rattle snakes - as much as I hate them I think I'll take squirrels over those anyday lol.
      That hurricane is terrifying me - I listened to a woman being interviewed who lived in it's path and said she was going to hunker down and stay put - absolutely insane.
      And pinning your shorts to your top ? You're joking of course - but I'm not when I tell you I had to pin a pair of joggers to my freaking underwear today ( my painting clothes ) because they kept falling down - never thought of the consequences of them pulling my underwear down as well LOL
      Have a fabulous weekend girlfriend !

  11. You and the squirrels have got to reach an agreement or you will end up in a loony bin far, far away from a paint brush and I fear you would curl up and die. Move South - we never finish our Fall chores because there is always a sunny, warm day next week.

    You must have balls to do the barre exercises - blue balls.

  12. Too bloody funny!! Brilliantly hilarious, an end-of-week MUST!! Thanks for the smiles....

    1. You sound like John Trina - " Bloody " is his all time favorite word LMHO !!!
      Thanks so much
      Happy weekend :)

  13. I don't understand why you are afraid of squirrels. They aren't carnivores. I had one that would eat out of my hand. And you had so much fun making those fairy gardens, why not make a squirrel garden? I think the curtains for the pumpkin "windows" are a charming idea.

  14. AGGGHHH!
    My kids let them eat out of their hands!
    To be honest with you I don't understand how anyone ISN'T afraid of them - I'm terrorized - seriously all I see are rats with bushy tails !
    AND I'm a chicken shit Teddee - I'm basically afraid of my own shadow LOL
    Have a great weekend !

  15. You're a hoot! Good for you giving yoga a try ... Used to do hot yoga with my daughter, it was great. We're giving CrossFit a am I old...can't do what I used too!

  16. Suzan you don't look like you're afraid of anything, you seem to handle John pretty well. I used to be so scared of all things creepy and crawly until I became a mom, then commando mom took over and I would have killed anything to protect the kids. The only thing that scares me now are snakes... Are we in Halloween mode here?

  17. I love squirrels, Suzan, and there is no reason to fear them. The only reason you should fear them is if they are rabid, but you will know this by their erratic behaviour! They are very intelligent and sweet. Oh, and I used to have a rat as a pet, they are very intelligent, gentle and sociable. The rodents to fear the most would be (believe it or not), hamsters, as cute as they are, they are more likely to bite than their rat cousins. Lovely post, as always. :)

    1. You know Linda - it was ingrained in me at a kid - I was constantly told they were rats with bushy tails lol.
      My daughter had a rat as a pet - YUCK - sorry just not that into them LMHO !!!

  18. Okay-GREAT selfie of you with your foot on the toilet-thanks for that least you weren't bent over it barfing from fear over the encounter with that FIERCE squirrel. lol

    I have said this before and I will say it again. Your John and my John are cut from the same cloth. Both brilliant men that make no sense most of the times and neither that really LIKE to do "hands on" projects and married to women that only KNOW hands-on projects. lol

    Have fun at Yoga! Good for you. I still have my excuses list I am following lol xo Diana

    ps- IF you get a chance pop by my blog and go visit my son's sign place----

  19. Ok Suzan, another comment from me. This time to let you know that I'm nominating you for the Blogger Recognition Award. Simply because you keep me in stitches and of course because you are truly talented! Now you don't have to accept this nomination but I am going to put it out there to let the world know how awesome you are. I'll be posting on Monday. Thanks for all the laughs and for your friendship.

  20. Oh Mary - I'm honored ( deeply so - I really am ) but I can't accept it - I just don't have the time to move it forward to 10 ( or maybe more? ) bloggers. I'm going to be helping Ashley with Evan this week - and we've had kids here for a sleep over all weekend're so sweet to think of me and I feel terrible.
    I used to have an " Award Free Blog " someone on here - now I see it's not there anymore....................
    Hope you " get " it - I SO don't want to hurt your feelings !!!

    1. My feelings are not in the least hurt. I expected that you might not be able to accept, I know you are so busy. I am going to include your name anyway because you are someone that I really respect and I want people to know about your awesome blog. And if I can get some more people over to you than I will be happy. No worries, just keep making me laugh! xoxoxoxoxo (I will send you the link tomorrow.)


Due to a large amount of spam ( that I'm tired of going back to posts and deleting ) I'll be using comment moderation from now on !!!
Can I beat these spammers at their own game? Probably not - but I'm going
to try my damnedest !!!