Murphy's back everyone ( as in Murphy's law ) in full force.
First of all we brought the tree home - it's such a pretty tree don't you think?
ok - lets string the lights on it, shall we?
Oh - they're not here - or there - or there - or anywhere
so we'll use the wrap around lights - you know the ones that come in one big piece and you simply wrap them around the tree?
There - how does that look?
Can I leave it alone?
Of course not - I find the lights look too " uniform " ( and really someone in a "uniform" should come take me away - seriously - I need a nice long break in a straight jacket of some sort )
Down they all come -
Suzan says - John I think you have to go to the storage unit
John says - Why?
Suzan says - My string lights are there I think - I can't find them anywhere
John - WHAT ARE YOU DOING? - YOU JUST HAD LIGHTS ON THE TREE
Suzan says - I hate them - they make the tree look like it came off of an assembly line
John says - When do you need them for?
Suzan says - Well let me see I have 5 days to bake - shop - wrap - and decorate the tree -
ummm - now would be good if you don't mind - and then you don't have to do anything else -
you can lay down and watch t.v. all night if you want
John says - It's almost 10.00 at night - by the time I get back it'll be 10.30 - you're being very
generous with my spare time - thank you.
And he came back with 4 more boxes of Christmas supplies - who has 10 large boxes stuffed to the brim
with Christmas paraphernelia? It's insane ( you see, I really do need that straight jacket )
With everything except my string of Christmas lights in them.................
OMG - he never had to go - they were at home the whole time - and I swear to you I will never tell the
poor man that - never.
Ok the lights are now strung - all beautifully hidden inside the tree - and it's been sprayed with fake snow
Time to decorate!
hmmm - maybe now would be the time to tell you that this is the second round of decorating -
COMPLETELY. The first round was all Fuschia Pink - AND I'm still not " feeling " this one either - but I'm tired and it'll have to stay
Just about finished - lets turn on the lights and see my master piece
that's right - a whole string of lights burned out - LOVELY -
I'll just fix that up and hop into bed - I'm absolutely exhausted -
and my sparkling clean house looks like this once again
if you notice that's not the same mess that was on my dining room table 2 days ago - THAT mess was entirely cleaned up - this is tonight's mess
but I'm really exhausted at this point - so I'll just get up extra early and clean it all up - at least the tree's done
And off I go to bed - lean over to turn out the lights - and CRASH BANG SMASH CRACK -
John says - what the hell was that?
Suzan says - It's Murphy - I just know it's Murphy
John says - what the hell are you talking about?
But I have a sick feeling in my stomach - a real nauseating sick feeling...........................that Murphy just snuck into the living room
Could you weep for me? Bet you already are
John says - Grab one side
John says - where are you going?
Suzan says - to get my camera
John says - OH FOR GOD SAKES - WHAT THE HELL DO YOU NEED A PICTURE OF THIS FOR?
Suzan says -
One more time - so I started off with all pink decorations - then went to all blue - what the hell, for finish
I'll use both this third and final time.
It's the most wonderful time of the year
With the kids jingle belling
And everyone telling you "Be of good cheer"
It's the most wonderful time of the year
It's the hap-happiest season of all
With those holiday greetings and gay happy meetings
When friends come to call
It's the hap- happiest season of all
straightjacket - a garment similar to a jacket that is used to bind the arms tightly against the body as a means of restraining a violent person
Do you think they come in PINK?
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Sorry but this post cracked me up. Are you sure that we are not related?ReplyDelete
Look now! It's hard to drink my coffee while laughing... you're right, you definitely had to take a picture, what a night you (and poor John) had!ReplyDelete
You should sell tickets whenever you begin projects. At least you'll get a little compensation for your suffering -LOL! I Love reading about your wild adventures! Your tree is beautiful! What memories you have every time you look at it! Have a Merry Christmas!
Too, too, too funny - I'm sorry to laugh but, it is a funny story. Maybe the next 5 days will go uneventfully for you.....ReplyDelete
I think it turned out lovely and I thoroughly enjoyed your story. You'll remember and talk about this for many years to come. :)ReplyDelete
You could totally dye one pink.ReplyDelete
I don't need to get crazy about Christmas decorating - I have kids to do it for me. That's why I had them, you know.
You are always fun to visit:) It would be boring if you had a straight jacket, LOL.ReplyDelete
And to think we go through this *deliberately* each year!!! Oh, too funny - and sad - and if they don't make a straightjacket in pink, I'm sure we can find some spray paint somewhere. :-(ReplyDelete
Just yesterday my husband and I were having a 'conversation' and suddenly I felt like I was living your life. LOL
What kind of vitamins do you take? I need to get me some of them.ReplyDelete
I can lend you my straightjacket!!!!!!!!ReplyDelete
OMG you are a riot. Love the tree for the 3rd time. My tree started to topple over this year too, I heard it going and caught it in time. Mind you mine is 20ft tall. I hollered for the kids (through there terrible loud video game) and they helped get it up again. I did loose a few of my favorite glass ornaments in the crash though.ReplyDelete
Well, I needed a good laugh this morning being as we are in the midst of a BLIZZARD. And, NOW I have blackmail info on you- that he DIDN'T have to make the trek to the storage unit...but I will hold that info until I really need it! I think your tree looks just spanky-danky in blue and pink...is it a boy or a girl>? xo DianaReplyDelete
Ha! Too funny Suzy. It looks fabulous, really does. I remember our tree falling over in the middle of the night when the kids were younger and several of their favourite ornaments broke. Tinker bell lost her wings and a few other became less magnificent in one way or another but the funny thing is that we still put them on the tree every year....they hold memories.ReplyDelete
Great tree Suzy!
ROTFLLLLLL!!!! Especially the straight jacket part, lol! In pink, of course. OMG, yeah, Murphy definitely came by. Thank you for the belly laugh!ReplyDelete
But your tree looks maaaahvelous, dahling!
No matter what kind of day I'm having, reading your blog always makes me chuckle or laugh out loud! Or both! You're husband is a saint - and very lucky! Merry Christmas!ReplyDelete
LOL - thanks so much - he really is a Saint - ( have you ever tried living with one ??? )Delete
As I posted earlier today, I knew John would cut your plank tree but he did even more than you asked for (boy does he know you) and then for you to turn around and request 6 more - me thinks you are pushing your luck.... So glad you have John and as close as I looked at your real tree I didn't see any of his body parts hanging from a branch nor on the plank trees(lol).ReplyDelete
Please, please post a tut on the plank trees - I'm really very visual and like dimensions plus I don't have a John and that didn't sound very lady like so I'll borrow from you if I may, O (MG) that didn't come out the way I meant it to. Won't make these this year but they will definitely be in my booth next year, if that's OK.
Merry Christmas and don't worry "us gals" will visit you and bring our own can of PINK spray paint - you'll be the best DIY in the prettiest little pink straight jacket ever!
Sooo easy Carolyn - I'm making a couple tonight - so will do a tutorial tomorrow on them - promise!Delete
John's for hire ( I'm his agent ) want to book him LOL ?
We can share a room at the asylum - you in your pink and me in my blue - we'll match your tree (which is gorgeous). I'm taking a break from the third round of wrapping for the third round of guests to come (my stepsons and girlfriend for 4 nights). Ho ho ho! And on top of all the company, prep, wrapping, baking, shopping, cleaning, decorating.......I go and apply for a job and had an interview this afternoon. And you think you're crazy!!!ReplyDelete
Me and my tree believe it fell over. They must be siblings.ReplyDelete
I had a tree fall over one year. It landed on my little girls on Christmas morning. Every year after that, I put a big nail in the wall and wired the tree to it. It made the girls feel oh so much safer!ReplyDelete
When considering which tree to buy don't be over ambitious - buying a taller tree than you need is not only wasteful but will also be more expensive. Once you have brought your tree indoors make sure you saw off at least an inch from the base to help it draw up water. Keep the reservoir topped up especially if room is very warm. It is best not to position your tree too near to radiators or a fire. Check This Out for more details.ReplyDelete