I always wanted to meet Joan Rivers - always wanted to sit down somewhere with her and have a glass of wine and always assumed that would someday happen ( I just hadn't quite figured out HOW to make that happen )
People that make me laugh are my favorite people - and she made me laugh.
I went to a lot of her shows here in Montreal ( at the Just for Laughs festivals )
We lost too much funny this year
And three of my very own personal favorites
John Pinette - oh my gosh - how I adored him
Robin Williams - I'm still grieving - deeply
And now Joan -
At a time when the world needs more and more of a reason to laugh - their absence will be sorely felt in my world.
RIP - I'm feeling a little jealous of Angels right now because I know you three are making them laugh their wings off.
Lewis Black - PLEASE take care of yourself
I'm literally losing my last thread of sanity with renos and furniture makeovers - and yet I had to
ask if this was still available - I just HAD to - don't ask - the devil made me do it.................because the angels are currently too busy laughing.
( when you're that close to being committed into the loony bin - that's the sort of thing you do after all) I'm too afraid to mention it to John because I'm terrified he may have the power to sign the papers that will see me taking a lonnnng break from reality )
So part of me is hoping I get it
And part of me is dreading it
4 chairs plus 1 with arms
4 ft x 4ft square table - both sides fold down for easy storage
Buyer must pick up - no deliveries
How could I possible NOT ask about it?
The price is reasonable - it's a drop leave table - and 4 harp chairs AND a captains chair to boot!
And why am I asking you guys - who are every bit as certifiable as I am?
Now I have no choice but to tell John -
Oh boy - this may be the end of my blog as you know it.
John was almost physically sick the other night working on these floors
Because of the stench -
We're scraping off layers and layers of crap here - some of it almost a hundred years old................( I use the term " WE " very loosely - since I have not crouched on that floor yet - but it's every bit as exhausting and nauseating to watch him doing it - trust me - I keep trying to explain that to him )
And I'll be crouching when it's time to refinish them.
I told him we had a mask for the stench
The following conversation DID take place - believe it or not ( and personally I wouldn't believe it unless I was actually involved in said conversation )
John says - How do you turn the bloody thing on?
let me repeat that
John says - How do you turn the bloody thing on?
Suzan says - dead serious - Well there's a plug
John says - Fuggedaboudit - I'm not scraping floors and worrying about tripping up on wires
Suzan says - Just joking -
Suzan says - dead serious - It's run by batteries
John says - Are there batteries already in it? With my luck they're dead.
Now that I think of it I can have him certified just as easily......................
John says - DO NOT PUT THAT ON YOUR BLOG
Suzan says - Do you seriously think I put everything that goes on in this house on the blog?
I met a lady at Home Depot last week - she was sawing a piece of molding.
I can't use a saw.
And I can't use a blow dryer.................
Embarrassing when you call yourself a DIY'er and you can't use one of the most fundamental tools of the trade.
I told her how impressed I was - and we got to talking a little bit.
Her name is Susan
She's 55 years old.
She's born in April.
Freaky - except she can use a saw........................
And I can't.
Oh and I have a blog.
And she doesn't.
For those of you that are wondering why we're doing the floors ourselves - here's da truth about that.
We've completely run out of reno money - zilch - nada - nothing left - so we have no choice.
It's come down to hiring someone to do it - or buying groceries.
I'm all about giving up groceries - we have a huge yard where we can forage around ( it amply sustains 3000 squirrels - 62,000 birds - 2 skunks living together in sin - and a ground hog - surely we could find something to exist on ) John, however, is insisting on store bought food - snob that he is.
And for the rest of you wondering how wise a choice white slipper covers are - I'm here to tell you that after 24 hours they still look the same as the day they were put on ( which would be yesterday )
Best decision I ever made !
Except there's now a blanket ( white ) on the chair because I got tired of hearing myself
SODA - GET OFF THE CHAIR - OMG - GET OFF THE CHAIR !!!
So I can honestly guarantee you that you'll be very happy with them for at least that long !
I made tacos the other day - John won't eat tacos................
Just try them I begged but there was no convincing him
I can't imagine living without them - they are my fast food ( I will NOT call them junk food ) of choice - and I really could eat them at least once a week.
We were slow up here in Montreal being introduced to them - so I only had my first one when I was a teenager and I've been hooked since.
A world without tacos?
Not a place I'd be interested in living in.
What a cold - lonely - empty place it would be ( so you see how much stock I actually put in them )
John's ok with cold and empty I suppose -
But I have a theory about taco lovers.
Taco lovers LOVE life - they love to dance - they love to be surrounded by flowers - they're passionate about everything they do - everything they see -
They are touched by stories and they laugh and cry easily.
Oh and they love to paint furniture.
Taco haters are boring ( for the most part - of course there are exceptions to every rule)
And speaking about rules.........................
My menopausal body is so confused over this whole day and night situation.
But really - who said you HAVE to sleep when it's dark?
And who said you can't have ice cream for breakfast?
Rules - rules - rules -
I used to follow them.
( kind of )
Yesterday when Mary ( the slip cover girl ) was here she asked for some water - when I opened the fridge she said - Oh I wish it were later so I could have a beer.
Wish it were later? Than 12 noon?
Well I smashed THAT rule to smithereens quickly let me tell you
Really, who said you can't have a beer at noon?
( in a wine glass - it must always be in a wine glass - no matter what time of day it is - that's a rule I never break )
It tasted good.
It tasted sinfully good actually ( so the devil probably made me do that too )
John says - What the hell are 2 beer bottles doing on the counter?
Suzan says - Mary and I had a beer
John says - It's not even 3 o'clock
Suzan says - We had one each 15 minutes ago - sheesh - what are you - the beer police?
(is lying about the time we actually had the beer a crime - or just an admission to myself that we really did do something wrong? These are the questions that haunt me night and day )
John says - Well it's pretty early - the rule of thumb is
Suzan interrupts - DON'T TALK TO ME ABOUT RULES - please. thank you.
Ok - I'm all chatted out -
Have a wonderful weekend everyone -
See you on Monday - bright and early
( well in blog time - since bright and early is when I actually go to bed most of the time )
In the meantime I'm going out back to gnaw on a tree or two - I'm feeling a little hungry
Just love to wake up and laugh first thing in the morning (0645)....it get's my blood moving and clears the cobwebs in my head! Have a beautiful weekend, my beautiful blogging friend!ReplyDelete
YOU have a beautiful weekend too Laurayne !!!Delete
I'll be on my knees for most of it - working on floors
Just call me Cinderella
Have a great day.ReplyDelete
I'm 55, born in May and my middle name is... Susan. :)
I can use a saw. I can use a blow dryer but I hate blow drying my hair.
Enjoy your weekend. Good luck with the floors.
Well, you certainly ARE chatty at 1:49am. lol I am a night owl, too, and a morning bird which means no sleep. lolReplyDelete
Loved all your stories and that you had a beer at noon---er---almost 3. And-tacos? I never had a taco in my life until I was 22 years old. Something I never saw in a little town in the mountains of PA. And pizza-you know-they used to call it pizza pie? 1I was about 16 and! my mother made pizza PIE (in a pie pan with pie crust) and my father said- well, I don't know what all the hoopla is about over THIS stuff. lol
I'll be watching for an update on the floors AND smoke coming from your area when John discovers you bought ANOTHER table and chair set. BTW, my hubby's grandmother had those chairs and a Duncan Phyfe table that she used with them. It will be great when it is is redone. xo Diana
I have two favorite blogs that I visit everyday. What is it about us out here in blog land that we like to see what is going on in someone else's life? It's like a reality show only much much better. Well, anyway, its fun and I enjoy it.
Just the other day I found out that the other blog is going offline for a while or maybe forever. They have good reasons and I am not mad at them but I do admit it makes me sad.
So wanted to say that I am glad you, my other favorite blog, is still here making me laugh, letting see your reality.
Have a blessed weekend.
PS. Hi, John!
You're so sweet Pam !Delete
Sorry to hear your other favorite blog is taking a break - but am thrilled to hear I'm one of the ones you visit ( thanks so much )
You have a blessed weekend too -
Hi Pam !!!
Hello Suzan....loved thispost so many bits n pieces its good to hear whats going on with you John and Soda....Never found out if you received my email about the fairy pots...ReplyDelete
take care-love dee x
I still am so sad about Robin too!!! And Joanie was such a shock, so sad. Saw Lewis Black a few months ago, we are still talking about his humor. I will buy an extra Powerball Lottery ticket today, I might get lucky in Kentucky!!!! Anyway, had tacos for dinner last night, and don't tell anyone but I've had sangria and mojitos before noon before!!!! Have a wonderful weekend and a blessed one!!!! XOXOXOX KarenReplyDelete
Sangria BEFORE noon - well well you rule breaker you LOL - did you have it with breakfast???Delete
Isn't Lewis Black hilarious - I just love his delivery - he's so angry lol
Good luck with that powerball ( yay - I can get my bathroom done if you win !!! ) I had tacos for lunch and supper actually - and I may have them for breakfast - there's a big batch here and I'm the only one that'll eat it. You have a wonderful and blessed weekend too girlfriend !
Good Morning Suzan. I love the table and chairs it will look awesome after you are done with them. I am sad too about losing so many funny peeps of late. You are so right with things going on in this world we need to keep the laughter makers. I loved Joan Rivers and Robin Williams so sad to have to say good bye to them. Glad you are loving your white slips. I have had mine for years and they wash nicely and I just throw a blanket on the part of my sectional where Libby my basset likes to sleep. It is all good. Have a wonderful week end.ReplyDelete
Geez...1:49 a.m. and you are blogging!! I can so relate to that time of the day!ReplyDelete
Have a great weekend Suzan.
If I could only have one food for the rest of my life, it would be Mexican food. Tacos are a staple, but I don't make them. When Juan & Lily have the best taqueria, actually named Taqueria Tepatilan, in town, why would I try to make them. They catered my retirement party and the taco man made them to order right in front of you.ReplyDelete
I spit upon beer drinking 'rules'.ReplyDelete
Please tell John I'd also have no idea how to operate that doojab. However, I can operate a saw. If I have to.
That was a fun chat, Suzan. I'm happy that John is wearing a mask to clean those icky floors. I hope there isn't any asbestos fibres in the flooring!!! You'd better wear a mask too. And Soda. I'm sure you checked all that to be safe before hand. :) The new dining set is a beauty and I'm sure it will be painted up pretty soon. Enjoy the weekend.ReplyDelete
You just brightened my day with this whole train of thought. . .oh, I LOVE tacos, and now that they've been mentioned, I'll have to have some or I won't be satisfied. Thanks for the suggestion! Agree with you about Robin and Joan. Very sad, and still disbelieving that both are gone.ReplyDelete
Good Evening Suzan, You are wonderful, you always make me laugh, but I have to tell you, I have never eaten a taco in my life.... is it because like John, I am English.... I'm not sure, but I have to plead my case.... I love dancing, I love, love, being surrounded by flowers and I am a passionate person.... well when the mood takes me. I wonder, if I try eatint a taco, will I love dancing even more, enjoy flowers even more and become even more passionate.... I think I had better stop there.ReplyDelete
Have a wonderful weekend.
Best Wishes to you.
Must be an English thing Daphne ( I suppose you wouldn't gnaw on a tree either???)Delete
I DID say there were exceptions to the rule - so you're one of them - but the first opportunity you have to try one - do so - you'll be hooked - I promise
( I know that because you love to dance - and be surrounded by flowers and you're a passionate person )
Have a wonderful weekend yourself!
I love tacos, but my stomach doesn't like the hamburger... such a sad situation!ReplyDelete
Have a great weekend!
I have a table and chairs very similar to those Suzan. They belonged to my MIL's parents. They used it as their eat in kitchen table. I use it behind my couch...when it's folded up it slants down on both sides, it needs new parts but I don't want to mess with it. We use the chairs in random places. And the fabric is pink looking just like those. I'll paint it one day, not while my MIL is living... she would die right behind my couch if I put a paintbrush to it. HA!ReplyDelete
I love all Mexican food! ALL! Life would be less than without sour cream and jalopenos. Loved this post Suzan!
Enjoyed your "Chatty Cathy" rendition. Joan Rivers would have been proud to meet you and to read your blog. As for the pizza and tacos, I think I was in college when I first ate those delectable dishes. My father always asked "where is the rest of the meal?" whenever my mom served pizza. Don't envy your job this weekend. Hope you have knee pads! Hugs, Linda@Wetcreek BlogReplyDelete
Congrats on the table and chairs and good luck with John. You'll make them look fabulous.ReplyDelete
How can John not like tacos? He doesn't know what he's missing, does he?
I love your white slipcovers! The room looks beautiful with them and I've heard they are easy to clean. Can't wait for Monday's post...you make me laugh with your stories. Hang in there!
I'm hungry too, and I'm debating driving into town for pizza because I don't feel like cooking. Hubby would probably have a hissypissy though, so I'll probably cook. *sigh* :)ReplyDelete
The chairs are pretty. They'd be hard to keep white here, w/a hubby and two kids in the house. My teen is getting downright reckless w/picking up after herself. I need a rules police for that... this mama's getting tired of saying the same ol lines over and over.
Well I really enjoyed that stream of consciousness but maybe that's because I've had a glass (or two) of wine, it might also explain why I had three attempts at spelling consciousness :-D You know what I think about rules, their only purpose is to be broken and yes I have had beer for breakfast but don't tell anyone! I also like tacos even though I'm British and don't get me started on dancing, flowers and being passionate about EVERYTHING, is there any other way to be? We went to view at an auction today, if Colin bids successfully on all the furniture I wanted we will need a warehouse to store it all. That's why I'm not allowed to go on the actual day, the only time we both went he discovered to his horror I was bidding against HIM as well, I'm very competitive when it comes to shopping LMHO. Keep the madness coming it's why we love you! xoxReplyDelete
I've never been to an auction in my life - but John would kill me if I bid against him - OMG that is too funny !!!Delete
I'm not even allowed to do groceries anymore - ( there's decor sections in a lot of the grocery stores here - I have no control LOL )
I enjoyed reading it.
Made me laugh a few times too
and that's really good.
Rip Joan Rivers
I'll miss her especially on the Red Carpet events
she's so funny, witty, and talented.
Thanks so much Ann !Delete
The diary of a crazed blogger LOL
So you Suzan!! All of it! Loved reading this rambling but funny post!ReplyDelete
Gosh, so all this time I thought I was weird and crazy staying awake till 4 am and eating pie for breakfast and it's really MENOPAUSE?! I feel so normal now : ). Dave was calling me weirdo so much I was starting to believe him. Sadly we are loosing the ones who make us laugh and kept us sane, very sad. Sigh. While awake till one the other night I watched videos of Joan - it was the best way to spend a sleepless night. I'm with you beer at noon, humour crazy husband, and throw a blanket on the slipcovers. Life is too short for any more crap. Hugs, PattyReplyDelete
We drive 45 mins down to my favorite Mexican restaurant to buy my favorite tacos just about every week. The actually soft fry them the old fashion way and call them "fried tacos" instead of the deep fried "Taco Bell" type shells that I hate. So, yes, we are Taco-Sistas for sure.ReplyDelete
I was about to pour myself a glass of rosé for lunch... But I guess it's too early, then...ReplyDelete
You are so funny, but I have to tell you I have skunks too who are living in sin....hell I think my porcupines are too. I just saw two this morning...they weren't up to anything but eating, but I know what goes on in those trees! Love that table and chairs......I am so glad you got them. I peed a little when you told John to plug that mask in.....OMG that is so hilarious!ReplyDelete
"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are gray!" I knew you would understand if I sang to you! I said you were nuts....you thought I was kidding...didn't you? You sure made me smile and laugh this morning!ReplyDelete
This was the next best thing to sitting next to you with a glass of wine (or beer) and chatting. All of your little stories brought a smile (even the first one, especially the Lewis Black line - love him).ReplyDelete